“Real Artists Ship”

Colin Johnson’s blog


What Happens when Nothing Happens?

More times than I’d like to think, when I talk to someone in a call centre, or fill out an online form, nothing happens. For example, a few weeks ago I had a perfectly clear and polite conversation with a call centre person from O2 about increasing my phone data allowance. They explained very clearly what the options were, and what the costs were, I chose one, they confirmed when it would start, and then…nothing happened!

This isn’t snark. I’m just interested to know what happens within the business logic of the organisation that leads from this seemingly clear conversation to no actual action. Do these requests get lost immediately after the request has been made, e.g. the person makes some notes and then gets another call and loses the notes, or the context of the notes, when they get a chance to return to them? Surely large organisations can’t be relying on such a half-arsed system?

Do requests get added to some kind of queue or ticket based system to be actioned elsewhere in the organisation, and then somehow time out after a while, or get put in a permanent holding position whilst more urgent queries are dealt with? Or, are the requests that I am making too unreasonable or complex, so that the company policy is to make sympathetic noises to the customer and then just ignore them once they have got them off the phone? I can imagine that this might occasionally be the case, but surely not for a request like the one above, which must be one of the simplest piece of business logic for organisation to execute.

Or, are there people in the organisation who are just being lazy and ticking off a lot of their work without actually doing it, like my schoolfriend who, for months on end, got all of the advantages of having a paper round without any of the actual work by systematically collecting a bag of papers every morning, then setting fire to them in a ditch in the local park?

This strikes me as something that would be almost impossible to research, and indeed very difficult even for companies to discover the cause of internally. Yet, this must be a massive issue; I would reckon that around 20% of interactions of this kind have resulted in the agreed action not happening. What can organisations do about this?

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